So let us begin with yesterday…the day of errands. Well they all went well and fairly quickly, and by the end of the day out i had stood 7 times…even i did not realise how many times i stood when i have running around to do…hmm the revelation was interesting.
Now i came home full of intentions to do like two more…i just had to have lunch first since breakfast was 3 biscuits (yeah i know i was bad). So i ate my lunch in the erm afternoon and while waiting for that to settle, the lights went out (power outage) which was preceded by a loud explosion. That was a clear sign. Did i mention storm clouds were rolling in just before i drove home…had to race with the rain to get inside before it came pouring down…i lost btw, lol, do not fight mother nature SHE always wins 😉 So explosion no power and me with a dark house realising that damn 7 will have to be enough for the day…figured i would make it up today.
I got up, i ate properly, i got a full 8 hours last night, im kosher, it was all ready to happen. 8! again today this time with 15-second stands, which would be 9 tomorrow with 15 second stands. My goal for the week. I switched chairs ok…got myself into position and then pushed up…….to realise i could not put ANY weight on my legs. They simply would not hold any of my weight. None. I basically used my hands while my legs buckled and then fell back into the chair.
My legs were cramping all day yesterday and when went to bed and woke up this morning they hurt. My calves hurt, my feet hurt. I thought it was due to not doing enough exercise, that they wanted to move and i was not doing enough…apparently not.
Just before standing my mom told me “You should take a break try again tomorrow or monday, you do not look so good.” I answered “No i really want this, and that means even on the days i may not be 100% i still try and do.”
The lesson here: Sometimes we want something so badly, we blank out all the signs that indicate danger or that something is wrong. We focus so much on the goal we do not notice the big pothole along the road we about to fall into.
I do want this. However the only way i will achieve it is by taking proper all around care of me, which means resting some days when all i want to do is push harder.
Resting and patience. Two lessons i keep having to re-learn and two lessons i hate coming face to face with…grrrrrrrrr…
For now though i need to rest and come back at this again say Monday when my body is able to continue on its walk back….blessings everyone….